Finding one thing always leads to another, which excites me because I am constantly learning new things and about new things! In this case, I stumbled across a website, www.thesinglelife.com
, because I am still perpetually single after 5 years and finding any resource for empowerment is vital.
That particular website led me to Danielle LaPorte an author who has awakened an entirely different thought process in my mind, and while I could not purchase every book she has written at one time, I definitely plan on owning all of them. I listen to her podcasts, I've read a portion of her book, The Desire Map, and have actually already re-read portion of it just to ensure it sticks.
I digress though, as usual, the purpose of this is to give you some insight, to motivate you to understand Danielle's thought processes and to share my own GOALS WITH SOUL with you, and hope that you'll find it a refreshing change of thought.
Davis Development has a sound company culture, and as part of that culture, we have been adopting a new practice of each of our community teams having goal boards. While this is not something altogether new for most of us in our personal lives, or even for an on-site team, we narrow down these goal boards to each individual team member, we want to know their motivating factors and what their dreams are. Nothing to do with occupancy, delinquency or the property itself. This is literally about each individual team member.
Because I have been reading Danielle’s book, I wanted my team to tackle our goal board and their personal goals differently. I sent them this email today…..
As part of our Davis culture, we like to have goal boards for each individual community and team. This is something I really love to do in my personal life and professional life and I want to get you all excited about the same.
However, I want to do something a bit differently. I don’t want you each using your material goals (big house, more money, new car) – I want to see your DESIRED CORE FEELINGS. I want to know how you want to feel and we will center your achievements/accomplishments/goals around those feelings.
Here is the thought process behind this way of thinking, vs the outdated way of thinking…..”you’re not chasing the goal, you’re chasing a feeling you hope reaching the goal will give you.” (Danielle LaPorte) For example, your goal is more money, in order to feel freedom, your goal is a new car, in order to feel luxurious or abundant, your goal is to travel the world in order to feel adventurous.
It’s backwards and exhausting, because ultimately, material items may very well not result in the achievement of those feelings. You wind up chasing something that could end up being a never ending chase, but, when you focus on a feeling, you’ll be surprised at what other achievements/accomplishments/tasks etc manage to make you feel a certain way, which is the ultimate goal.
Here are mine, and I want you all to utilize some different words (I can give a plethora of different feelings in order for you to hone in on your own), but for example purposes, mine are:
(I could put that I want to travel more here, and maybe that will make me feel more adventurous, however, being a socially awkward introvert, being adventurous and accomplishing that feeling could simply be going to a MeetUp Group or somewhere else alone, THAT is adventure to me)
(I don’t know how I will accomplish this, I have fears, some are social anxieties, I can overcome based on the above feeling of being adventurous, I could also aim to conquer the other typical fears of heights, snakes, spiders and the list goes on, but I want to know that I came out at the other end of this year wildly fearless, and something else may wind up making me feel that way.)
(I want to remember every day to be genuine and authentic to who I am and with keeping this in mind, remind myself during any and all social interactions that I don’t have to be agreeable to be liked)
(This actually comes with a specific goal oriented mindset, to complete and take my CAM test by October of this year, however, I know that at the end, I will feel a sense of pride, however, I will also remember that my level of pride comes in training my team to succeed, watching my property prosper, etc)
(This is that feeling that everyone chases when they set the goal to “Lose 10 pounds”, yea, I want to lose 10 pounds, but all I am aiming to achieve with that is THIS feeling, confidence, so my goal isn’t to lose those pounds, it’s to feel confident, which makes me fight harder at the gym, it makes me hold my head high and feel good about myself, because if I’m constantly striving to lose 10 pounds, how am I going to feel psychologically when I’m at 5 pounds, or 8 pounds, I’ve cheated myself out of feeling good about myself for a good job already done.)
(I’m not sure, but I know this is how I want to feel, so I’ll back into each day to feel this way. I’ll approach each challenge at work and in my personal life in such a way to feel this feeling. I could say I want to be 90% within 8 months, but I don’t want to be disappointed when I miss that mark, so I’ll simply strive for this feeling and aim for it each day)
Again, these are mine, and I hope that you’ll think long and hard about creating your goals with soul and feeling that same clarity. I look forward to seeing everyone’s.